SATIRE
Superheroes in Poverty
Not All Jobs Pay the Bills
With his full-body red jump suit, Peter walked in the room. As he removed the mask from his face, it revealed sunken eyes, five o’clock shadow and a look of utter exhaustion. Greasy hair clung to his forehead as he cracked his back before sitting down.
“F***ing hate these things,” he exclaimed.
“The mask?”
“Everybody just expects their superheroes to wear a mask! But does anyone ever ask if they’re comfortable? No!” he explained before muttering a couple more curse words quietly to himself.
“Do you think they could make more breathable masks?”
“So it’s my fault for being a superhero? Superheroes all need to wear masks, huh? I see how it is. Bullshit. How about, I’m the superhero who doesn’t wear a mask and that’s my thing? ‘oh look, here comes No-Mask-Man! Here to save the day for this old hag who keeps getting her purse stolen. How many damn times can you get the same purse st — ’” continued the disgruntled Spiderman.
“But surely the salary makes up for some of these incon — ”
“Psssh! Salary? You think they pay us? I’ve been living in the same apartment for eight years! There’s a leak over my bed and I had Eggo waffles for breakfast this morning…